So god gave me this life, and I'm going through it all by myself. Negatives here and there. I just can't seem to get them out of my way. And I don't know why. This month could be the most unlucky month I've ever had. I lost my love, my bestfriends splitted up, and ... I won't be able to contact Bestie anymore. Oh wells, I don't know if I should be talking about her again. Oh what the heck.

Kakak Zilah needed her phone back. So I only have my SIM card with me. Yesterday night was the only and last time I got to talk with Bestie. Well, unfortunately it didn't go well. The last moment we talk was the last moment we argued. Well, I just calm myself down and kept helping her out with her issues about her family. That's what bestfriends are for, right? Some parts of what I said did hurt her. And that's really awful. Of course, I'm hurt too by her changing character deep inside her. Talked about it though. And I thought of getting firm with her just to make her realise. And so I did. Sorry, Bestie.

Well, I've decided. That night was the last time we talked not only because of me not having my phone, but ... I guess I should stop all these. I don't wanna hurt Bestie anymore. Since the start we met till now, I am nothing but trouble. Like what her dad told me, "If you don't get to know her from the beginning, none of these would've happened!" Everynight, that phrase came into my mind. And to think about it, it's really hard for me to decide. Bestie need me, but at the same time, she's always hurt. It's really hard to say goodbye. So I didn't. BUT, I still left, wishing her goodluck with her life. And I know we'll meet together again, someday. Well, it's hard for me to say this. But I've always been sacrificing myself for her own sake. That'll be because - I'm still deeply in love with her. But, honestly, I don't even know if she feels the same way. So, yeah. Its hurtful for me.

It's my last sacrifice - to let her move on with her own life. Yes, I promised her on not to leave her. But like I said, I'm nothing but trouble. So I've gotta do what I've gotta do. It's hard. But wishing that she'll finally realise how much I felt about her, I'll still wait. That's the least I could do to fulfill my promise for her. Well, there might be other guys out there, better than me. They might be able to replace me. I'll still be waiting for her to come back to me. But If she's got a better guy, then I'll wish her good luck in her new relationship? So, yeah. She's free. But, whatever her decision is, the both of us still has half of each others' hearts. So ... Haish. I don't know what else to say. This could be the end. I might not be ready to close this Love Storybook, but then again, I've gotta do what I've gotta do. I hope she won't forget whatever things I told her about. Those words really taught her heart. They are the only words that could change her into a better person.

And as for me, I think I'm having a life of my own, half of my heart missing. I'll swore never to have any relationships again - IF she don't come back to me. It's fate, there's nothing I can do about it. I could just hope. And the rest of it, I'll leave them all up to her decisions. Well, I hope this phrase could do us great, "Till death do us apart."

Please, take good care of yourself.